Hunting Down the Elusive Prey: a restaurant that still exists.

As warned by the travel guides, restaurants come and go with such frequency that by the time of print, they may no longer be there.  Since D is old-school, and armed with a printed Time Out Beijing guide, I knew it would be hit or miss.  I tried to hedge out bets by cross-checking restaurants on the internet, but even that is not quick enough for the elusive prey... the Beijing restaurant.

We were initially looking for a restaurant called Hot Loft, which was said to have awesome hot-pot.  After a confusing cab ride, where even the driver had to ask for directions twice, we finally found the exact address... of where they had been.  In its place was a very brightly lit seafood place (why are so many restaurants here lit like hospital rooms?  trust me, you don;t always want to see you food in that detail).  Not what we had in mind.

On the way, however we passed some very pretty alternatives, so I convinced D to wander back on our path where we passed an intriguing single-malt scotch bar, which was nicely designed (and reminded me of the commercial scene with from Lost in Translation with Bill Murray). Then we came to The Green T House, hidden behind glowing green light, white curtains and an impossibly high thin door.  No windows and very secretive (you have to ring the bell for entry), it has a very exclusive ambiance.  It gets mixed reviews from locals,mainly due to bad service, but everyone agrees that its a feast for the eyes.

The restaurant was the creation of a woman named Zhang Jinjie, a chef, calligrapher, artist and musician (and now, restauranteur).  Apparently she is China's only female master chef and plays yang qin (Chinese Dulcimer) and gu zheng (Chinese table harp).  The design was very NY art loft and gorgeous (although showing a bit of wear and tear).  A long white room lit at the far end with cool green spot lights across a tangle of branches suspended from the ceiling. On one side, along the windows) there were tea-house style seating on white banquettes and in the center tall (like Alice in Wonderland tall) dark wood chairs seated around a communal table.  On the opposite wall they projected arty animations accompanied by an eclectic soundtrack that included everything from European classical music to Chinese classical music to jazzy electronica (which was a bit too loud at times, but cool).  Over all it was more stage set / performance art than restaurant, which made up for the "mama huhu" (so-so) service.  (See? I'm learning Chinese ! ;P)

Of course they don't allow you to take pictures there, or anywhere here other than public spaces (so you will have to look at their pretty flash images on their website).  I think because they are all paranoid about getting copied.  A valid fear given that this is the land of knock-offs.  But I managed to sneak a snap of D before the waitress told me to stop ;)  So aside from the pics I took of myself in the multi-mirrored ladies room (they cant stop me in there !) where I recreated (in my head) the closing scene from All About Eve, I am relegated to pulling pics of the interior from the internet.  

Food-wise it was yummy.  Even though they brought me the wrong dish (I am pointing on a menu, how hard can it be?), it was all still super yummy!  Being that it is a tea house, many of the dishes include tea leaves or tea oil, which has a lovely bitter and piquant aroma.  The table breads are served from a basket with chopsticks and are tiny little knots (I called them belly-buttons) of dough, they taste a bit like a profiterole or croissant dough, but not flaky, more doughy.  You dip them into a green tea pesto (I will definitely have to try making this at home!), yummy!

The drink list was printed on clear plastic, I ordered a non-alcoholic mocktail (a lot of mocktails here, I guess a lot of people don't drink), called Bitter Lemon, which was like a bitter lemonade over tea leaves. D refused to order my suggested drink for him (the "Beautiful Boy Martini", why not?) and had the Green T Martini.  Both cocktails were served in the kind of crockery you normally see tea or miso served in.  beautiful, hand made pottery and presented on a long tray with bamboo leaves, which was beautiful, but takes up a lot of room on a small table.

We started with these amazing little fennel (and tea leaf?) dumplings, steamed and briefly pan seared. The insides looked to be packed with leaves and that lovely bitter licorice aroma, so different from many dumplings with their mystery meat interiors ;).  The laowai (foreigner ;) behind D ordered a dish served on a bed of rose petals: veal with black sesame?

Then we were served, what turned out to be a dish called "Autumn leaves" which were like those Vietnamese lettuces rolls, a butter lettuce leaf filled with shredded vegetables, what could have been some kind of pickled vegetable or meat, fennel seeds and what might have been chrysanthemum petals.  It was yummy and we ate it even though I ordered something else.  They then brought another dish I hadn't ordered and this time D still felt the order mix up required some telling-off so he marched up there in stocking feet to straighten it out (we were sitting shoeless on the white banquette seating, like Bed in SoBe).

Whatever he said did the trick and they removed the dish and brought him the spare ribs he ordered which were super yummy, but so rich we had to fake-finish the last ones (only take a bit or so out of each).  No room for dessert! 




With all the rich food and huge portions, the only way I am not gaining weight here is due to all the walking, and walking, and walking...

"Drink Me": More Alice References...

 

 Actual size. Slight Edit Ann reference. Swarthmore, PA.

"... this time she found a little bottle... and tied round the neck of the bottle was a paper label, with the words "DRINK ME" beautifully printed on it in large letters. It was all very well to say "Drink me," but the wise little Alice was not going to do that in a hurry. "No, I'll look first," she said, "and see whether it's marked 'poison' or not... if you drink much from a bottle marked "poison," it is almost certain to disagree with you, sooner or later". However, this bottle was not marked "poison," so Alice ventured to taste it, and, finding it very nice, she very soon finished it off.

Sounds familiar...

"What a curious feeling!" said Alice. "I must be shutting up like a telescope!" 

And so it was indeed: she was now only ten inches high... she waited for a few minutes to see if she was going to shrink any further: she felt a little nervous about this; "for it might end, you know," said Alice to herself; "in my going out altogether, like a candle. I wonder what I should be like then?" - Lewis Carroll, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland

Wow.  I never realized how fatalistic Alice was, or how morbid children's stories can be when you really get into them.  I'm not even talking about the Brothers' Grimm, which are obviously frightening, but even watching "Where The Wild Things Are" as a film left me thinking I must have blocked out the creepy parts out as a kid.

Back to the photo: The chair is actual size.  Its on the Swarthmore campus.  Also the bottle was there when I got there... swear.  When I posted this on Facebook with obvious Alice references, one of the first responses was an Edith Ann quote.  My mother was really into Lily Tomlin, but I never thought my peers would remember that character.   So maybe I will end this post with some Edith Ann quotes.  She was perhaps a bit more savvy than Alice, but both wise beyond their years ;)


"I have always wanted to be somebody, but I see now I should have been more specific."

"The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win you're still a rat."

"Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain."

"Reality is the crutch for people who can't cope with drugs."

- Lily Tomlin as Edith Ann

"M-Alice In Wonderland": My Birthday Party 2009

 

I chose the "M-Alice In Wonderland" theme for my birthday party this year.  It was intended as a kind of bizarre tea party gone awry.  It lived up to that goal and then some.  Here I am as "M-Alice". 

 

 

I made my own cake, of course.  The cake itself was a checkerboard cake assembled from strips of white and chocolate cake so that when cut they resemble a checkerboard.  There are kits for this kind of thing but they only come in small round 9" cake pans and I wanted to do a larger rectangular cake, so I had no choice but to do it by hand.  It was tricky, and I miscalculated the number of layers I needed, so I ended up with a shorter cake and a surplus of white cake, but it worked out in the end and was a three layer checkerboard.  To do it properly I would have needed another layer of chocolate.  But it turned out fine since my carb-fearing guests didn't finish the cake anyway, opting more for liquid refreshment ;) 

I stayed up late making all of the integral Wonderland characters,my versions of them.  It is important to me when making novelty cakes and edible art that it in indeed is completely edible, making it a greater challenge.  Therefore I don't want to use anything plastic or cardboard or foam, etc.

Most of the figure forms are built of marshmallow and draped in fondant (Alice, White Rabbit and Cheshire Cat) while the other ones (Caterpillar, Mad Hatter's hat, Red Queen and King) are built completely of fondant.  Their feature and accent pieces are made of rolled and cut Mamba candy, or candy such as licorice, sprinkles, dragees, etc.  I also made a tiny tea set out of a meringue, fondant and dragees.  I really enjoy these tiny obsessive tasks I can get lost in.  I get it from my mother ;)

I also made cookies in the shape of playing cards (for Alice's croquet match with the Red Queen) and tiny chocolate cupcake "gardens".  

I can't believe David sat patiently for so long carefully placing the little flower candies and sprinkles in a specific color scheme and arrangement.  They turned out adorable.

 As you can see I have now reached the "flammable" age (where it takes so many candles to count your years that things get a bit... flammable.  It's a valid worry when you are at a costume party covered in wigs, feathers and highly flammable materials ;)

 I always like to document the aftermath.  I couldn't bear to toss the rest of the cake, but I couldn't bear to eat it either so it sat in the fridge for awhile.  Interesting how the figures in their melted disarray bore a striking resemblance to me and my guests at the end of the night ;)